Rosamund Pike was nominated for a Golden Globe award for her stellar portrayal of Amy Dunne in the movie Gone Girl. Gone Girl was one of my most favourite books and movies of last year and if I were a member of the Hollywood Foreign Press, Rosamund would definitely get my vote. She was incredible as Amy Dunne and she made the movie, in my opinion.
Rosamund had her second child about 5 weeks ago, so she’s been largely out of the limelight for those past 5 weeks, resurfacing on the red carpet at the Golden Globe awards. Unfortunately, what could have been an amazing return for the actress was marred by an ill fitting, unflattering dress. I’m attaching a picture for your reference.
Not good, right? And the general public felt the same way. Now, before you get all ‘but she just had a BABY!!!’ on me, just don’t. I understand that she just had a baby, and no one is criticizing her body at all. What I’m criticizing is a horribly ill fitting dress that I was afraid was going to slip off her shoulders and reveal her girls in all their glory. Her body looks amazing—her dress, sadly, does not.
But of course the minute you criticize the dress of a woman who is 5 weeks postpartum, the sanctimommies come racing out telling you that you’re a bully; that she looks stunning for a woman with a 5 week old. That Hollywood just can’t handle a woman who isn’t a perfect size 0! Look how brave she was for wearing such a dress after just having a baby!
Well, I call bullshit on that. There is nothing ‘brave’ about wearing clothing. Sorry, I reserve the word ‘brave’ to describe things that truly are brave – like people who are fighting terminal diseases and you know, soldiers who are fighting for our freedom. Wearing a dress after having a baby does not qualify as brave, especially when you have an entire team of stylists, makeup artists and hair people whose one job it is to make you look good.
You don’t have to be a new mother to experience a bad day on the red carpet, one only has to look to Tina Fey to realize that. Rosamund Pike having a new baby had absolutely nothing to do with her red carpet ‘miss’, but a bad stylist and an ill fitting dress did. Imagine if the top of that dress fit so that it didn’t look like her breasts were at her waist! She would have looked amazing. But can we please stop ‘excusing’ how she looked because she had a baby? Not to mention that 5 weeks in Hollywood is like 9 months in real people time.
So let’s just face the fact that Rosamund Pike had the worst fitting dress of the Golden Globes – something that can’t be blamed on having a baby 5 weeks ago or 5 minutes ago or 5 years ago. Sometimes a bad dress is just a bad dress and there’s nothing ‘brave’ about that.
You had me at “sanctimommies”.
Mostly, I just don’t care about what any of them wear. There seemed to be a while there when dresses were interesting, but once Sharon Stone wore that Gap T and blew the roof off the whole shebang, I kind of lost interest. Now it’s just a long line of “Look! Here’s my ribcage flanked by two Vs from . See? See my daring plunging neckline?” *gag*
Can you call it a neck line when it reaches one’s *ahem* vajayjay?
I’ll just wait over here for JLo’s Oscar memo. 😉